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Sep 18

Oh No, What Have I Done?

USDB

USDB

Oh no, what have I done?….

If you know me in person, or if you have read my previous posts, I generally tend to be more lighthearted.  My dilemma is that because of my past, I have to shift gears completely to tell my story.

The posts related to this particular life event will be of a more serious nature.  Being a Christian and from a career military family, you can imagine the guilt and shame that would follow such a mess.

This post is not to glorify my past but to reveal it.  This is the beginning of a true story about my life.  For years this story had been told in passing and in pieces.

I have finally come to the point in my life where I feel God wants me to share it.  To quote Max Lucado “This is the kind of mess God can use for good.”

I hope you can bear with me as I  become authentically transparent.  Thank you in advance for reading.

October 1989, Alexandria, Louisiana.

A friend of mine came in to the nightclub and told me that he overheard some cops in the parking lot saying they were coming in to get me.  I told people that if I ever got caught, I would consume everything I had on me and go out in oblivion.

For some reason the day before, I put one hundred Ecstasy pills in one by one inch plastic zip lock baggies that I normally used for LSD.  This prevented me from taking any.

Two Sheriffs, walked in, creating no exit for me.  As one of them grabbed my arm, I simultaneously dropped my jacket containing all of my drugs on the floor.

Outside, I was slammed up against the wall and told not to move by the Officer who was pointing his gun at me.  I was searched and they only found ten cents in my pocket.

This made them angry because this was supposed to be a legitimate bust.  I think if they had noticed the jacket, this would have all been worse for me.  I deserved it but, I have to say I am glad that they never found it.

I was cuffed and shoved into the car, and at that point the gun was holstered.

As the metal door was locked shut, I realized that this was for real.  I was not getting out of this one.  All the running, drugs and freedom was over.

 My stupidity and bad choices led me to this point.  I was in jail.  My head still numb from the Ecstasy I took before they grabbed me.

My wrists still sore from having the handcuffs on in the car, and while sitting in a chair as the Louisiana State Police interrogated me.

I asked for the smacks in the head because, I was either smart mouthing, or not telling them what they wanted to hear.  They were talking about my, having polluted their community with illegal drugs.

As I lay on the steel bed, in this dark cell, I knew that the “God, if you just get me out of this” prayer was not going to work.  I was only 19 years old and I had seriously screwed up.

I think I cried.  I am not totally sure, but I think I did.  I thought of my family living in Germany.

My parents were probably going to be glad I finally was caught.  At least they would know where I was.

I could never really let them know because my dad was in the Air Force and if he knew, he would have to turn me in, or be charged for aiding a military fugitive.

I was AWOL.

About six months prior to this night, I had run away from the Army.

I believe God was with me but, I was not with God.

Oh no, what have I done?….

  • Mark Ryan

    Wow man, this story is about to real in a hurry. I can’t wait to read the rest.

    • David Mike

      I’m glad that I am able to finally tell this story. Thanks for taking the time!

  • emilycarlton

    Thank you for sharing your story with us David! You’re bold and courageous. Looking forward to see how God had His hand in your life as you continue to share.

    • David Mike

      I feel humbled by His grace!

  • Jason R Sprague

    You have a story that can help heal many. Thank you for sharing. I can’t wait to read the rest.

    • David Mike

      Thanks for taking a moment to read. I hope that others can benefit from my story.

  • Darren Mike

    Thanks for sharing so openly… I don’t think I’ve ever actually heard your story as told by you, so some of these details are quite interesting. God has done a pretty amazing work in your life & can’t wait to hear in your words how that played out!

    • David Mike

      Thank you for your kind words and support! I appreciate you taking time and being interested in my stuff!

  • Wow. This doesn’t sound like a fun night. Or something that’s an easy thing to talk about. Thanks for sharing!

    • David Mike

      Was a terrible night, I am not sure how I survived this whole ordeal other than now knowing God had a plan.

  • Thanks David — for finding the guts and grace to share your wild ride with us!

    • David Mike

      Thank you for all your help in proofing for me!

  • Melody MIKE

    Thanks for being brave and sharing! Excited to learn how God uses your story!

    • David Mike

      I am glad you had a chance to read. I appreciate it.

  • Josh Hostetler

    Oh man, can’t wait to read the rest!

    • David Mike

      I can’t wait to write it. Thanks!

  • Jake Brower

    Real is better than perfect…

    • David Mike

      Definitely being authentic. Thanks for your leadership.

  • aprilbest1981

    oh my goodness…I need the next post..way to TEASE us!!! how long are we going to have to wait to find out? 🙂

    • David Mike

      Thanks for taking the time to read, I was planning on posting about every 4th post in this series. I might have to up it though since I left everyone hanging.

  • Jordan Hopper

    I love it, shows a side of you that most people would never be willing to share, not to mention the fact that I’m hooked!

    • David Mike

      I’m glad you read it and I feel like I have found my voice. Thanks!

  • sarah hinrichs

    so glad the bad didn’t consume you, you are an amazing person! ready to read the rest of this story!!

    • David Mike

      Thank you for your kindness. I will be going further back in time before I go forward.

    • dilemmamike

      Thank you for getting to know me over the years. Glad you can see the good in me. The feeling is mutual!

  • Emmanuel Michael Vlassakis

    Incredible story, there is something about owning our deeds that is very freeing. You’ve shown great courage.

    • David Mike

      I am honored that you took the time to look at my blog, Thank you so much. More to come.

  • Becca

    Thanks for sharing your story. As I mentioned before, I’m going to share it with my family, as I have a cousin in Leavenworth now. I think watching your story unfold, and seeing who you are now, will give them some peace.

    • David Mike

      Thank you, I hope that it will allow them to realize that we don’t have to be defined by our circumstances or our bad choices. God has forgiven us once and for all!

  • Sandi Dickinson

    I love when someone realizes that their “mistakes”, if you will, can be shared to help others. Many, however, never realize this. Thanks for sharing. I am sure this will be an inspiration to many. By the way, I knew your dad, and was a friend of your mom’s in high school. I know they are very proud of you David. God Bless.

    • David Mike

      Thank you for your kind words. I appreciate your taking the time to read. This is all new to me and I am humbled at how God is using this story of my mess for good.

  • Mari Zambory

    I’m so touched by your pure and raw honesty…I eagerly await more

    • David Mike

      I am glad you were able to connect with my story. I will probably post more frequently than I originally planned. Was going to do every fourth post as the serious ones but maybe I will do every third or every other.

  • Daniel Mike

    David, you’re right in that this is a story that has been told in bits and pieces. I can’t say I even know the whole story. I’m glad you’ve decided to be so transparent. That takes a significant amount of courage and I deeply respect that! When I see you today, the husband, father, teacher and community pillar, it’s hard to think about where you’ve come from and the trials you’ve experienced. You’ve been such a source of encouragement to me in so many ways. You are a very resilient man and I’m proud to call you brother, by blood and by Christ. I can’t wait to read the rest of your story!

    • David Mike

      Daniel you are an inspiration to me. Thank you for your service, to the country, your family, but first to God. Thank you for supporting my story even though it is hard to hear.

  • Brett Smith

    Thanks for the perspective. Being redeemed – assigning value to the worthless – is an amazing story!

    • David Mike

      Thanks for reading, I appreciate your perspective. Keep up the lifestyle choice. I’m with you!

  • Angie Tolpin

    Great post MIke. Thanks for sharing and pointing people to one of the essential roles we get to play in advancing the Kingdom of God– glorifying Him, even in the ugliest parts or seasons of our lives.

    • David Mike

      Thank you for reading and feel free to share with anyone you think might connect with my story. A book is in the works.

  • Dana (Mike) Jeffries

    I remember the first phone call when u told us u were in trouble & on the run & the letter u sent telling every little detail that was read aloud to my youth group! David you are an amazing son, brother, husband & father! I look up to u very much & am so proud of u & the Christian man you’ve become! I love you Big Brother!

    • David Mike

      Thank you for being able to forgive the man I was. I love you too.

  • Sarah Las Vegas

    Goodness! I’m staying tuned for more. Thank you for sharing yourself and your story here.

  • I decided to start from the beginning. I’m not sure why I took so long to click your links. As you heard 5 months ago, thanks for sharing this! It takes great strength to share openly about our faults, even if they are deep in the past.

    • David Mike

      Thanks for reading Brandon. It’s awesome to finally be able to tell my story. It’s taking me awhile to get it all down. I appreciate your support.

  • Tonia Hurst

    David, wow. Knowing you a little and only more recently, this story made me appreciate the long journey you’ve been on, how far you’ve come. I’d like to hear more in a sequel.

    • David Mike

      I appreciate you taking the time to comment. I hope to have this out in a book by the end of the year.

  • Denise Beidler Jackson

    Nice job…you’ve left me wanting more!

    • David Mike

      Thanks for checking it out. The following posts related to this story are tagged Ft. Leavenworth. Hope you follow along.

  • These are the kind of stories that draw people in – because they are so raw and so honest and being so transparent it a risk, but I can say I am glad you shared. I will keep reading as long as you keep sharing. Great story ….

    • David Mike

      Thank you for checking it out, I appreciate your input. This is the prologue to the story. All related posted are tagged Ft. Leavenworth.

  • This is definitely a story that needs to be told. Thank you for being so open and honest with. God can use everything for good… as long as we let Him. Keep sharing! (And,, yes, I think this would be great over on Wattpad!)

    • David Mike

      I appreciate you checking it out. Thank you!

  • JenBaierl

    Finally found the place where I needed to start. 🙂 Thanks for your authentic transparency.

    • David Mike

      Thanks Jen, I appreciate the support from your family.

  • Mariane Kvist Doktor

    Hi Mike, I’ve read some of your story, it’s some tough things you’ve been through! I really respect that you’re sharing the story and so honest. I’m glad you found a way out of it. I’ll come back and read more later.

    • David Mike

      I appreciate you checking my blog out, it’s a crazy story that I wish was not true, but I’m glad God is using my mess for His message!

  • Denyse @ Glitter, Glue & Paint

    I can not relate to you as far as the getting in trouble part but I can relate as a parent who has a son that has made some serious drug mistakes and deals with addiction. My baby as I call him (he’s not a baby anymore) is doing some time and it kills me. But, I have thought like your parents. I at least know where he’s at and that he is safe. God Bless You!!!

    • David Mike

      If you read further, my father testified in my trial. I think my parents were relieved to know I was “safe.” I am sorry to hear about your son. I hope things turn out better for him. I know that I am alive today because of prison and God.

  • Sherwood81

    God does not leave you merely because you are in prison. He was with you from the dawn of civilization and will be there in the end.

    • David Mike

      Thank you for reading my story. I am no longer in prison. These are just some feelings I had during that time. I am so glad that he did’t give up on me and stayed with me the whole time.

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